10 things I did not do today:

1. I did not spend all morning cleaning the kitchen.
2. I did not take the pile of garbage to the dumpster.
3. I did not fix the loose board in the porch so that cats can't get out.
4. I did not discover Banks in my bedroom covered in feathers.
5. I did not find feathers all over the kitchen floor.
6. I did not find streaks of blood on the linolium.
7. I did not look under the couch, fridge, and dishwasher for a suspected dead bird.
8. I did not find a dead bird in the pantry.
9. I did not use two dust pans to scoop it up and fling it over the fence.
10. I did not spend all afternoon recleaning the kitchen.